Is your child or toddler afraid of bugs? Your little one follows you around the house ever since a fly got in. You can’t sleep alone, shower alone, or even pee alone. You’re at a complete loss. Here are a few ideas to try, if you haven’t already tried them:
Pretend play claims to be crucial to children’s healthy development. Pretend play from the age of about 2.5 yo to 6 or 7 yo has shown increases in language usage. And an awareness to your child that their thoughts may differ from the thoughts of others. Different perspective taking is linked to imaginative play (Jenkins & Astington, 2000; Leslie, 1987; Singer & Singer, 1990; Singer & Singer, 2005). Pretend play also encourages talking more about feelings and emotions. And the ability to regulate their emotions so that they can adapt to their environments. Social development and the ability to increase emotional intelligence is also linked to imaginative play (Jent, Niec, & Baker, 2011; Seja, & Russ, 1999; Slade and Wolf, 1999). In summary, your child’s imagination is incredibly important to their development. And we don’t want to punish them for it in any way!
Does your child have a paralyzing fear of wasps, bees and spiders? Does he have a panic attack and fear being stung or bitten? I bet that the the worst part of all this, is that it keeps him inside a lot. He refuses to go out and even says that he doesn’t like summer and spring. It breaks your heart that he doesn’t get to enjoy the outdoors like the other kids. Your child is not the only one with extreme fears – there are many other children like this! Here’s what you can do about it:
Your Own Fears
If you have a fear of bugs yourself, it can feel challenging not to pass it down to your child. It’s hard to cover up a deep rooted fear that you have, but because you love your child you do your best. It can be helpful too for your child to see you get bitten by mosquitos and be no worse for wear because of it. Sure it stings. Sure it’s uncomfortable. But there are ways to prevent it. And if the sneaky little critter still gets to you, it won’t kill you or your child for that matter. Talk about your fear out loud. And talk about the way you do what you do to try to handle your fears. You have the perfect opportunity to role model this to your child. Use it!
Magic Bug Spray
Try giving your child their own magic bug spray. This can be one either that you buy from the shops, or you can make one in your own kitchen with a spray bottle and some water. Use your imagination to manage their imagination! This can be helpful for any child who is afraid of bugs. But not so much if your child tends to get very upset really quickly after seeing bugs. If it feels like nothing you try helps her feel safe, then it might be her irrational thoughts about bugs.
Irrational Thoughts
Asking your child about her thoughts will help you get an understanding of the stories she tells herself. Kids at this age can believe anything and everything. “The toilet flushes and sucks out your poop? Well, then if I stand too close to the toilet bowl I’ll get sucked out too!” Work on uncovering your child’s thoughts. Ask questions like, “what do you think will happen if the bee flies into you? And then what? What is the worst thing that a bee could do to you? If that happened, what would you do next?” Once you understand their thinking, you can understand where their irrational thoughts start. And how to correct them. Children this age overgeneralize a lot. Help your child see the true reality of worst case scenarios.
Buzzing Sounds
Sometimes the buzzing of a bumble bee can be enough to put your kid in complete freak out mode. The trouble starts with your child’s imagination and the fear of the unknown. You can’t seem to convince your child that the pain isn’t that bad and that it will go away eventually. This is especially true if your child has been stung before.
Watching YouTube Videos
Some parents have helped their children by watching YouTube videos with them. By watching videos with their child of other people being stung, your child knows what to expect. The fear of the unknown is often times worse than the actual sting or bite. Sometimes there isn’t just a fear of pain but of how to react to it too.
Scaling
First help your child explain how worried they are. Scale them out of 10. Then run through the evidence with them. What has happened in the past? What do I know about this situation? Are there possible alternative explanations? What is most likely to happen? What would other people expect? How bad would it really be?
Then ask them to scale their worry again. After you work on breaking down their fears you can offer them rewards. For taking tiny steps towards facing that fear! Time together or an extra bed time story. Whatever is important to your child will be worth using to reward them for their bravery.
Does your soon to be 6 year old still scream bloody murder every time a gnat, moth, or even ant gets near him? Has he been like this since he was 3 years old – when this problem started? You probably feel like you are about to go insane. You can’t go anywhere without people thinking you are are beating your child, and that is why they are screaming. He gives up outside play and swimming to avoid bugs. And you’re about to give up on life because you don’t know what to do.
If you can relate. If your frustration with your child’s fear of bugs has hit an all time high. And if your child has many different levels of reactions to bugs, then comment below. I appreciate your story, Warrior. And I feel for each parent and child that goes through this. Thank you for sharing. And take care of yourself!
To read the first part of this series on your child or toddler’s fear of bugs, click here.
