If confidence is the tree, self esteem are the roots of that tree. Self esteem is what leaves us feeling content with ourselves, makes us like ourselves and take pride in who we are.
Self-confidence makes us feel worthy. Like we fit in and that we belong for who we are. It helps us to feel valued and loved by friends and family and helps us feel confident in making new friendships.
Self esteem gives us the confidence to try new things and stick with it when it gets hard. It helps us accept ourselves exactly as we are. Even when we come to understand that we can’t do all things well. And to ask for help when we need it.
The best way to grow confidence and self esteem in your child? Show them you love them just the way they are. Affirm them for trying, and not simply for talent or achievements. Read more on this in Mindset by Carol Dweck. Add it to your reading list right now.
Spend one on one time together each day. Even if for only 10 minutes a day. Specific and immediate praise goes a long way. Be a role model for confidence. You can’t grow their self confidence without practicing to grow yours too.
You are your child’s best role model. Straighten your crown to help them straighten theirs. Give them multiple choices a day to help them know they can make choices and make it work, even if it isn’t the “right” choice.
“Do you want vanilla or chocolate? Would you like the red bowl or the blue bowl? Brush your teeth now or in 5 minutes?” This helps your child feel like they are in control of their own choices. And that it is okay to make decisions too.
Make sure you are okay with the choices you offer. And when you are proud, remember to always check in if they are proud of themselves too. “I am so proud of you for trying your best. Are you proud of yourself?”
