You push yourself to excel at everything—delivering top-tier results at work, maintaining meaningful relationships, and keeping everything in perfect balance. But deep down, there’s this sinking feeling: ‘I’m falling short everywhere.’ It’s like no matter how hard you try, you’re never enough.”
High achievers in demanding environments often feel like they’re being pulled in two directions. On one side, the pressure to perform at work never lets up. On the other, the desire to invest in personal relationships feels equally as urgent. But balancing both can feel impossible, leaving you questioning your worth in both areas of life.
This tension creates a constant sense of inferiority. At work, you worry you’re not doing enough; at home, you feel guilty for being unavailable or emotionally distant. The result? Burnout, strained relationships, and a voice inside you that whispers, “You’ll never be good enough at any of this. Why bother?” It’s exhausting, and it can make you feel like you’re failing at the very things that matter most.
This week in therapy, a client shared: “I feel like I’m always disappointing someone. If I focus on work, my family suffers. If I spend time with friends, my work suffers. I can’t win. I feel inferior. I can’t maintain high quality work and maintain relationships in my personal life at the same time. It just doesn’t work.”
As we unpacked this, it became clear that their sense of inferiority wasn’t about their capabilities—it was about their impossibly high expectations of themselves. They were trying to give 100% to everything, all the time, without recognizing the toll it was taking on their well-being.
We worked on redefining success—not as doing everything perfectly, but as showing up with intention in the areas that matter most to them (not to others’ perception of them). They began setting realistic boundaries at work (e.g. switching off at 6pm) and practicing being present with loved ones (e.g. putting their phone on charge and not having it easily available in their pocket), even for small moments. Over time, they discovered that maintaining high-quality work and meaningful relationships wasn’t about perfection—it was about balance and self-compassion.
If you feel like you’re stuck in a cycle of trying to do it all and still falling short, you’re one of us and you are most welcome here. In my 1:1 therapy sessions, we’ll explore what’s driving this feeling of inferiority and help you create strategies to balance work, relationships, and your well-being without losing yourself in the process.
