As we are still living through the virus, we know that the impact of the virus on children and adolescents is still being studied. A big question parents have is about the long-term impact of it all. With increased screens for distance learning, less physical touch, and less time spent playing with other children, parents fear childrens’ brains and development is forever changed.
Just because your child might not have direct worry and fear about the virus, it doesn’t mean that their anxiety doesn’t show up in other ways about other unrelated things. It’s still worry, just expressed less directly. Parents, teachers, and communities have had to be anxious about their world to protect themselves and their kids. Kids have, in turn, become more sensitive to scanning their environment for threats and danger too. But, this won’t always look like a kid that doesn’t want to go to school for fear of getting sick. Anxiety can show up in other areas of life too like obsessing over food not touching other food on the same plate, feeling compelled to have the day play out perfectly according to their plan, and a kid that might seem more aggressive and violent than normal.
Covid has meant changes in predictable routines and higher separation anxiety. It has meant the loss of being present for major life events, from graduation ceremonies right through to physically saying goodbye to loved ones who have passed. The virus ultimately has meant a loss of safety and security. This stress has become a prolonged experience of stress too. Not all stress is damaging. But toxic stress can have a big impact on both physical and emotional health for a child, and its impact can be felt long into the adult years.
So what can you do to prevent the damage caused by your child’s experience? The research about this is clear and the answer is surprisingly very doable. It shows that even under terribly stressful conditions (such as prolonged abuse and neglect) just one supportive and responsive relationship with a caring adult as early as possible in your child’s life can prevent and even reverse the damaging effects of prolonged stress. You have the power to restore your child’s chaotic experience to be a more stable one. And you can do this simply by being a caring and responsive adult (doesn’t have to be a parent). Do not take this lightly and think of something else – something bigger or more expensive is the answer. From what we already know – you and your relationship with your child is the answer. You are a powerful part of the solution here.
