You’re always trying to do the right thing—help others, be there for your team, show up for your partner and family, and somehow keep everything together. But lately, it feels like no matter how much you do, it’s never enough. The weight of trying to be a ‘good person’ is crushing you.
For professionals who try to outwork their self-doubt, the pressure to be a “good person” often means taking on more than you can handle. You say yes to everything, even when you’re exhausted. You put others’ needs ahead of your own, thinking that’s what being a good person requires. But in the process, you lose sight of your own limits and well-being.
Over time, this constant striving can leave you feeling overwhelmed and resentful. You start to wonder: “If I stop helping, will people think I don’t care? If I say no, will they stop relying on me? I am overwhelmed with everything I need to do to be a good person.” And because you tie your worth to how much you do for others, slowing down feels like failing. But the truth is, you’re burning out from the inside while trying to meet extremely high standards on the outside.
This week in session, a client said, “I feel like I’m drowning. I’m trying so hard to be everything for everyone, but it’s never enough.”
We uncovered that their belief in “being a good person” was rooted in a fear of being seen as selfish for having their own needs and wants. But that belief was costing them their mental health, relationships, and even their ability to show up fully for the people they cared about.
Together, we redefined what it means to be a good person—not as someone who says yes to everything, but as someone who shows up authentically and sets healthy boundaries. They practiced saying no to things that didn’t align with their values, and over time, they realized that caring for themselves didn’t make them less of a good person—it made them better equipped to care for others.
If you feel overwhelmed by everything you think you need to do to be “good,” let’s shift that perspective. In my 1:1 online therapy sessions, we’ll help you create boundaries, redefine your values, and find a balance that lets you show up for others and yourself.
